Lessons that I have learned today

Today has been a rough day to say the least. I was up most of the night stressed unable to sleep, and had to get up to a day full of errands and appointments. But in the midst of this crazy....crazy day I have learned many things....such as...

1. Boogers are made out of sticky germs, or according so to Carter

2. If I sense God telling me to do something, it is in my best interest to listen. I will regret it if I don't.

3. You cant have big fingernails because they might make your nose bleed....

4. I should never....ever.... attempt to take all three kids to pizza hut by myself

5. Some mosters are bad guys and Christians.

6. I need to keep taking my prenatals because my sweet baby's iron will get low if mine is low :(

7. The christian monsters become bad guys when the lava starts to come out of their mouths and they don't obey quickly.

8. I can't base my willingness to have devotional time with the boys on how I feel.

9. Carter should never have his finger pricked for iron levels because it makes his mouth hurt...

10. It is ok for me to take a timeout from my kids for a few minutes...especially on days like today!

hope deferred

For those of you who know me, you know that I love to plan for the future. I'm not an organizer...ha..ha... definitely not an organizer, but I love to dream about my future and all the possibilities/opportunities that it holds for me. In high school I felt called to the mission field and envisioned a future of me in another country telling others about Jesus. That is actually what brought me here to NC, where I attended Piedmont to train in missions. That sounds like a great plan right? But the problem was that my hope was in going to the mission field. That is what kept me going. When that hope was taken away from me I was devastated. That changed everything. I grieved the loss of that dream and quickly transferred my hope into another dream...then another. Each to be taken away from me, causing me to settle on a lesser dream. Eventually I was left hopeless. Exactly where the Lord wanted me to be.

God has been showing me that my hope has to be in HIM. I had been so focused on what I could do for him...finding my purpose and worthiness in service. BUT the truth is that I am no less worthy serving the Lord right now than I would have been if I went to the mission field. I love the lyrics in Jason Grays song "I am new",

forgiven, beloved, hidden in Christ, made in the image of the giver of life, righteous and holy, reborn and remade, accepted and worthy, this is our new name

That is who I am regardless of what I do. So I say all of this to inform all my blogger friends that I am putting my hope in growing closer to my Abba and spending an eternity with Him someday :)

complicated

Tonight I've read through another mother's blog, that really inspired me to blog some more. I'm realizing that I make this way too complicated! In my mind I have set topics that I want to include in a certain order. For instance, as you can see I thought it would be good to start with my testimony...split it into say 5 different parts. That would lead up to topics on parenting. Great plan right? Not so much! I don't have alot of time to blog, juggling being a stay-at-home mom, starting up a business, and dealing with the trials of life. Therefore when I actually think about blogging, it becomes more of a chore, rather than an outlet.

The counselor (you will quickly realize that I overanalyze my life) in me realizes that I probably get this from my dad. This man will spend days putting together the perfect "z-model" (a chart from the Myers-Briggs that gathers ideas, information, and details to help plan an event) before he will ever do what he is wanting to do. For example I asked him if he could help me photoshop a different background for some of my cake pictures, thinking it would just take a few minutes to fill it in with a basic color. He proceeded to buy me some green fabric and told me that we can get online and find a picture of a room inside of the whitehouse. Next we could get a picture of a table and put that into the white house picture with the cake setting on top of it. The finished product would be our cake inside of the white house. Needless to say, I have yet to change the background for my cake pictures! The problem is that if the details are not perfected, the job just does not get done. I say all of that to conclude that I will overcome my pefectionism because I will never get around to blogging if I don't!

So here it is. My first random blog :) Expect more random topics, misspelled words, random commas (you will also quickly learn that I have an obsession with commas :), and other forms of imperfection to come in the future!