family pic

family pic

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Testimony part II

I'm back! The past few weeks my life have been absolutely crazy, so I just haven't been able to blog without feeling guilty for not getting other things done! I feel semi ok about blogging now :)

Lets see where did I leave off at. I think it is time to tell about my whole salvation experience. Pretty much every night when I would go to bed I would think about my need for a relationship with God. I longed for Him, but couldn't get past my pride to accept that relationship. I would pray a quick sinners prayer every night, but wouldn't mean what I was saying and would wake up and forget about what I had prayed. I just didn't feel sorry for my sins, and I really didn't want to change. One night during my eighth grade year, I was thinking about my need for salvation and trying to figure out who I should talk to the next day...and knowing that I probably wouldn't do it. It suddenly dawned on me that I didn't have to wait. I could do it right then in my bedroom. I decided to get out my Bible and read about Christ's death. For the first time I was broken about what He went through because of my sins. I prayed thanking Him for what He went through in order to have a relationship with me, and repenting of my sin that put Him on the cross.

That night I went to bed thinking tomorrow with be the test. I woke up in the morning and knew that I now had a personal relationship with Jesus. I went to school and became aware of sins that I never noticed before. It was a wonderful and freeing feeling to KNOW that I had been born again. To know that the instant I had prayed that prayer, I became a child of God and would remain that way for eternity. I look back at those sweet first years of my Christianity and remember being so excited over my new relationship with Christ. I truly loved Him and wanted nothing hinder my relationship with Him. The Bible became real and new to me and was no longer just a book. I was excited to read it and learn more about Christ. I never missed a day reading it for about a year. I would underline verses that spoke to me and sometimes I would end up underlining entire chapters, especially when I came to Psalms. There were a few nights that I didn't have a pen on me and used a crayon to underline while I was reading. Those pages were a mess! Really, just about everything in the Bible meant something to me, so I went a little crazy with the underlining :) But oh how I loved my new Daddy... unfortunately I slowly strayed from Him, and longed for the kindof relationship I had with Him when I first became a Christian. I'll talk more about that later. Thanks for reading :)

(The picture is of me during my freshman year. I thought I'd upload pictures of me during the stage of life that I have written about :)

Tuesday, July 20, 2010


I thought I'd start this blog out with my testimony, the work the Lord's done in my life. I don't share it like I should because I'm afriad of what people will think of me, but God has been convicting me that HE wants the glory. As I look back at the circumstances and events that have gone on in my life, I can see so clearly the work of God and it brings me to praise Him. I consider my testimony basically to be my life story, so I decided to post a little at a time!

My sister was in 2nd grade and had just gotten saved. Everyone was excited and she got to get in front of the church and get baptized and even got a new Bible. Of course I wanted to get saved too, but my dad told me I wasn't old enough, so I logically thought that only 2nd graders could get saved.

The day I was promoted into 2nd grade VBS at my church, I raised my hand saying I wanted to get saved. I repeated a prayer after my teacher and immediately knew that I wasn't a Christian because I didn't mean any of the words I had prayed. I told my family I had gotten saved, was baptized, received my new Bible, and felt like that there was no turning back now. What would everyone think of me if I told them I wasn't really saved? I couldn't get baptized again, and what would my grandparents think once they realized that I didn't really deserve the Bible that they had bought for me ( I'm not sure why the Bible thing was such a big deal to me!).

After that I had persistent nightmares about the rapture coming and would pray every night to be saved, but I was never sorry for my sins. I'm not sure why, but I just didn't feel bad about doing wrong, and I knew I had to to become a child of God. Something else that I experienced during that time that I haven't shared with anyone was a terror that would come over me when I was alone. When I was alone in my room I would hear screaming in my mind and would be terrified. Just to let you know, I never experienced that again after I decided to follow Christ. I don't know what the Bible says about that, but I just wonder if the screams and yelling that I heard had something to do with Satan.

Well, this will have to be it for the day. I'm certainly glad that my testimony doesn't end there :) Stay tuned for more!

Sunday, July 18, 2010

My first blog

I am officially a blogger :) Before I get started I just want to warn you that my spelling and grammer may not always be correct, but I'm really ok with that. I'm actually good at English, but I don't want to have to put the extra thought into this blog!

I'm creating this blog because there has just been so much on my mind lately, and I think blogging would be good for me to sort out these thoughts. I hope by sharing them, I can be a source of encouragement/entertainment/etc, to others. I realize that not everything in my life is appropriate to be shared, and therefore I cannot be an open book, but I do hope to give you somewhat of a glimpse into my life. Happy reading!